To grow your business - get uncomfortable!

You’ve heard the expression: if you’re not growing, you’re stagnating?

If not, you have now.

In my experience this is true.

It’s true for you on a personal level and it’s true for your business.

And, if you’re self- employed, your growth is linked to your business’ growth.

If you’re not pushing yourself and your business forward in some way, then it is stagnating. Left too long and it begins to shrink. You have to be strategic about your business growth and the growth you need to do to make your business grow. However, there are potential stumbling blocks, inherent resistance we all have when it comes to growth, development and change in areas where we feel uncomfortable and challenged.

You know this resistance to change as your comfort zone.

When you feel comfortable and confident in any role, doing anything, you are operating inside your comfort zone. To reach this stage is wonderful and it is important, as you are performing well in this role and this is good for productivity, customer satisfaction and sustaining your business. The comfort zone is not a bad thing in itself, it is just not the place you are going to grow, and eventually, neither is your business. So if you want to up productivity, customer satisfaction and grow your business, you are going to want to step up, to do something new and different, and that can be a challenge.

Now you are in the realm of stepping outside your comfort zone.

There are two ways to do this- either step just outside or way beyond it. The way beyond method suits some people as they love the challenge of really pushing themselves. It’s an adrenaline rush. For others, this method leads to overwhelm. I’m in this latter category.

For years I have had a fear of public speaking and tried to beat it. I’ve tried to speak at networking events, talks, lectures and so on and never been able to do it without feeling such overwhelming anxiety it was unreal. I knew my business was suffering for it, because I couldn’t get out there to promote myself. And so, rather than follow the lead of those I took advice from and take large steps which is what I had done in the past, I worked with a life coach to find a way that worked for me. It turned out that all I needed was to take smaller, more manageable steps. So I founded a public speaking group on MeetUp and for six months I spoke to whoever was in the room about something I was passionate about. It was never more than 5 people, but trust me that was a great start! In time I realised I could manage the anxiety fine and now the largest audience I have spoken in front of is three hundred.

The reason the audience size could increase is because once you have done something, your comfort zone expands with your experience. The fact of it is, if you want to keep growing you need to keep stepping out of your comfort zone. And, if you want your business to keep growing in new and exciting directions that stimulate and excite you, you are going to have to push your self to explore those avenues. This is an individual journey, as each person has their own sense of how they are prepared to stretch themselves.

Comparing your self to others does you no favours

Go at your own pace and make sure you keep moving forward, challenging your resistance to grow your self and your business.

Are you feeling cosy in your business? Have you noticed you haven’t offered anything new for a while because there is resistance within you to change and growth? Do you find your self feeling bored with your business? If so, you may be stuck inside your comfort zone and fearful of stepping outside it. Breaking out can be challenging for many reasons.

I am offering discounted coaching sessions to DRIVE members to support you in stepping out of your comfort zone and giving you the chance to grow your business into something that keeps evolving in the way that makes you grow too.

Get in touch if you'd like to talk about how we might work together or add your name to my mailing list to get new blog posts as they're published.
www.potentialitycoaching.co.uk

by Ann Hawkins

Do you make a good second impression?

It's easy to make a good first impression.

You get into the right clothes, do a bit of grooming, practice the smile and the firm handshake, learn a bit about body language and wham, bam, thank you m’am, you’ve aced the first impression.

Everyone thinks you’re a great guy or gal and relaxes.

Then what?

Then the real you gets an outing.

When you stop trying to impress is there a different you that comes out?

I’ve recently had to re-asses my opinion of someone who always gives a great first impression performance and remembered this that I heard from George Raynault, a multi-millionaire I worked with for several years who was a very wise man:

Someone at a reception smiled a hello and shook my hand warmly.

Later I saw him sneering at one of the waiters.

And, later still, talking behind someone’s back.

You only have one chance to make a first impression, true, but you have an

awful lot of time to make plenty of second impressions.

If you are meeting someone for the first time and may not get a chance to see

them again, a first impression really counts. For a very short time.

However, if you are going to be interacting with a person over a longer period of

time then second impressions are even more important.

Is someone who is rude to waiters and cab drivers or who cheats a barmaid out

of small change really someone you want to do business with?

If someone is always blaming other people and doesn’t treat others as they’d like to be treated why would you recommend them to others?

If people know they can rely on you to behave well and honorably even if no-one is watching, if you listen to them, make them feel good, cheer them up, be kind or give them good advice they will always seek you out and introduce you to others.

Second impressions are even more important than the first ones.

by Ann Hawkins

What can we learn from puppets?

"Puppets help us to learn about ourselves."

I asked Drive Cambridge member Jo Bryant of The Hands On Company, "What’s exciting about your business and why should anybody care about it as much as you do?"

This is what Jo said,
"Whatever our age, we use play to learn about ourselves. The Hands-On Company provides a vehicle for people to do this. We bring puppets to nursery schools, care homes and many other institutions and through different activities encourage people to play and create dramas that allow them to examine ideas and feelings that are sometimes too deeply personal to express in any other way.[pullquote] "An elderly man living with dementia suddenly started waltzing with a puppet, unaware that I was behind it doing my absolute best to keep up with his fancy footwork."[/pullquote]

Parents learn how to play with their children

One session we ran was with a group of parents who wanted ideas on how to improve the way they played with their children. There were a lot of social workers present, which made for a slightly uptight atmosphere, but the minute the puppets were unpacked the fun was irrepressible. One boy, who was was labelled a selective mute, amazed us all. He began to converse through the puppet he created with his mum. It was a truly touching moment to hear his puppet voice explain exactly what his puppet likes to do.

A member of another family group got in touch with me three years later and told me they were still using their family puppet to discuss personal changes and issues.

Making new friends

In a workshop about friendships, each child had a puppet to represent different types of friends. A nine-year-old girl called her dog puppet Meatballs. She decided he looked like a meatball and that this was his favourite food. We had great fun building up his character and deciding that he was a true friend as he was caring, but needed lots of meatballs to keep his energy up. In the feedback for this session, the leader told me that this girl's younger brother was very ill with leukaemia and she had not been eating properly. Her parents were thrilled that she had asked for meatballs for dinner that evening and excitedly described her play with the puppet. Naming and playing with the puppet seemed to be a turning point for her.

In another session I encountered a thirteen-year-old boy who was brave enough to share a bullying incident through the voice of a large monster puppet.

Making decisions about sex and drugs

In the work we do with teenagers, they use puppets to act out dramatic scenarios and we ask them to consider these three statements:
where are you?
who are you with?
how do you feel?
The scenes they play out help them to make informed choices around sex and drug use.

Moments like these happen whenever we interact with people - from a senior manager becoming overly attached to a hairy puppet because of shared conflicts to an elderly man living with dementia suddenly waltzing with a puppet, unaware that I was behind it doing my absolute best to keep up with his fancy footwork.

Sometimes when we run our businesses, we get bogged down in the worries of cash flow and energy dips, but it is the magical moments that help us to keep working at it. I continually feel privileged to be a part of these and I have the profound hope that there are many more to come."

Jo and her team also make puppets to sell, so if you'd like your own Meatball or have a project that puppets might help you to explore, give them a shout. 

You'll also find The Hands On Company on Twitter, Facebook and YouTube.  

by Ann Hawkins

Do you have invisible boundaries?

Instead of pushing against a barrier, what if you could just walk round it?

David Brown helps people to realise that most boundaries exist only in their minds.
The picture of a gate that has no fence attached to it symbolises the freedom we have to choose how we see things.

When I asked Drive member David what excites him most about his business, this is what he told me:

"I had a successful career in science for 15 years but always felt that something was missing. As a young man I was very shy and found that martial arts training helped me overcome my shyness and gave me confidence.  It also gave me an opportunity to understand a lot about myself and to explore self-expression.

I eventually decided to change my career and use the techniques I have learned and developed from life coaching and life experience, as well as martial arts, to help people who want to develop the confidence to express themselves and to do more of what they love.

[pullquote]My job is to be playfully curious, to challenge, champion and encourage people to look inward and discover their own truth, potential and meaning. [/pullquote]I’ve learned that delving into their untapped potential leads people to greater personal, professional and life success.

There is nothing more fulfilling than seeing people realise that things don’t always have to be the same and that they have the power to change their lives, often just by looking at them in a different way."

David has co- authored a book, Nourish the Flame Within, and is involved in Our People’s Coach Flash Mobs, speed- coaching flash mobs on the city streets of the UK.

If you know people who would like to have more of what they love in their lives, a new career, engaging in a new hobby or nurturing important relationships, they can get in touch with David at Potentiality Coaching 

by Ann Hawkins

The Drive Networking Manifesto

Our members have an inner DRIVE to be good at what they do, to be self-directed and connected.

People join our network to: 

Connect and learn,

support and be supported

inspire and be inspired

to be human.

To build great relationships: 

Be curious,

ask why rather than what

say, "tell me more"

find the person, not just the business.

To help and be helped:

Help people just because you can,

not because you expect anything in return

not because of karma

just because you can.

Listen more than you talk, 

leave space

work on being interested, not interesting

make people comfortable

Have conversations instead of pitching, 

look for connections, not leads

share your network

ask how you can help

Ask for help, 

helping makes people feel good

ask them, let them,

and pay it forward with no expectation of anything in return.

Trust. 

by Ann Hawkins

Autonomy, Mastery and Purpose

"The secret to performance and satisfaction is the deeply human need to direct our own lives, to learn and create new things, and to do better by ourselves and our world." Dan Pink

In his book "Drive", Dan Pink examines the three elements of motivation: Autonomy, Mastery and Purpose.

These are the words that struck a chord with me as I was searching for a name for this new style of networking organisation.

I've had a love / hate relationship with business networking for many years so, in the spirit of "take your own advice", the time had come to create something different.

The result is a business network that will do so much more than networking and will increase the success rate for small businesses (the majority fail before they get to five years old and of those that survive, very few make enough money for their owners to live on).

Members believe that collaboration is better than competition and get an unprecedented level of support and advice, from confidential mentoring to business training, networking opportunities, and help to join the dots between all the knowledge, expertise and skills that are available to help businesses to succeed.

If you like the idea and would like more information about what's involved in joining Drive, take a look at www.drivethenetwork.com and, wherever you are in the world, get in touch now and I'll gladly share the details.

Hope to see you involved in Drive soon!
Best wishes
Ann Hawkins

by Ann Hawkins

An invitation to listen to what you say

Communication is essential to your business.

by David Brown - Potentiality Coaching 

Communication is about conveying ideas simply so that people can easily understand and make informed decisions, yet it never ceases to amaze me that when we talk about our businesses to fellow business people as well as possible clients, we use jargon and industry specific phrases that often mean nothing to the person we are talking to.

One of the keys skills in communicating is listening.

There are three different levels of listening:

Level 1 is your own internal dialogue.
Level 2 is listening to the other person, fully, deeply and clearly, so that your full attention is on the other person, not just their words, but also the flavor and meaning beneath the words, movements, gestures, posture and energy.
Level 3 listening is taking all of that in as well as the feel of the room, the ambience, the noises and all that is happening in the environment around you.

Start by listening to your own internal dialogue, processes and feelings, then move on to the other levels.
Think about what your prospective clients are hearing when you speak.

Are they truly hearing what you are hoping to communicate?

Do your words mean to them what they mean to you?
Do they understand what you are about?
Will they walk away from the conversation aware of what your services offer and what it would mean to them if they took advantage of your hard- won wisdom, continual professional development, passion for your industry and willingness to use it to change people’s lives for the better?[pullquote]Let’s not settle for the glazed look we all sometimes get when we speak about our businesses[/pullquote]

Listen to what they are saying to you (level 2).

They are speaking the language of your next great client .
Learn to put yourself in their shoes and see their eyes light up when they understand what you do and how it can help them.
Let’s not settle for the glazed look we all sometimes get when we speak about our businesses. I believe this is the look of not understanding, followed by boredom. You want to see the lights go on in their eyes and have them be excited about what you do.

So please promote your business from this level 2 and 3 listening rather than through the lens of your own perspective (level 1).

I believe it will make a huge difference to the way people relate to you and your business and make you stand out in your industry as someone who relates to their clients and really serves their clients’ needs.

And that can’t be a bad thing for business, can it?

by Ann Hawkins

Stop "networking" just be human!

When you stop "networking" and start talking to people like an actual human being, you'll make great connections

How often have you attended a networking event or conference, and heard people ask “How do I meet the right people?”

Or maybe you've heard someone say something like “I want to make the right connections.”
When people ask, “How do I find the people who are relevant.” I get really annoyed.

It’s a pretty common type of question. A lot of it caused by networking "experts" teaching people to treat networking like some kind of battle plan.

It’s time to get out of that obnoxious mindset.

You’re in a situation with a high capacity for serendipity.

Open yourself up to meeting somebody who might not be obviously “relevant” but could turn out to be the most fascinating person you've ever met - or could be connected to people who ARE relevant to you! You just don't know until you take time to get to know people.

All it takes is one personal connection. One great meeting.

It’s not about the influence someone has; it’s about who they are and what they bring to the table. It doesn't matter what the first chess move is, because that person could facilitate a second, even more powerful move down the line. You could meet your next business partner, an amazing designer, someone with knowledge in a field you need help in. All it takes is one interaction, one meeting, one time when you didn't start by trying to guess how useful someone would be before you talked to them.

The bottom line is this: when you stop networking to get business and start acting like an actual human being, you will win in more ways than you thought possible.

by Ann Hawkins